Watch out for Cupid!

Hey y'all....Happy Valentine's Day. Seeing as about a month ago, I ended a two-year relationship, I have mixed emotions today. Part of me feels like this day should be 'celebrated' and I should just keep it together, smile when people wish me Happy Valentine's Day and so on...then I think, do I just be honest with myself and with others and treat today like any other day? It's not that I'm a 'wallower' in self-pity - I'm not 'in love' right now so no one else should be happy - no, that's not me at all. It's just when I begin to think of past Valentine Days with my ex....well, I miss him.

It was one of those situations where we were great friends, had a good start to our relationship (a REALLY great start) then when it was time to decide if this was 'for the rest of our lives' - we realized it wasn't. And honestly, we were both 100% ok with that. We loved each other but not enough to make the 'final' deal go through. Wow, it continues to amaze me at just HOW OK I am with that...but, I still miss him.

Looking back, I can 'see' now how it would have been TRULY difficult if we had gotten married...you know, we'd invested a little over two years to this relationship, we knew each other pretty well and to bottomline it - we're both at an age where it's just 'TIME' to settle down. Oh, I type that and a little part of me WIGS out...if it's not right, no clock, no calendar, no nothing is going to make it right. There are just too many folks who 'fall into that line of thinking' and that freaks me out. It's not that I have these standards that are completely too high for any guy to meet or that I'm a commit-o-phobe.....but I do want to wait for my soulmate. There, I typed it. My ex wasn't the SM I've been holding out for...but, I still miss him.

OK, enough of my story spilling out all over...I'm sure there's more to process and go through on this one but not today. Today I'll be smiling when I see happy couples holding hands, older couples smooching, little ones eagerly handing out their Valentines to classmates. Love is such a blessing in the many forms it comes in. I am blessed and I still miss him.

Much love to you all....